Not to Spoiled
How many of you you enjoy rocking your babies? I know I do. When Anna was born, I was given a book called Baby Wise. Over all the book was really good and it gave me a lot of knowledge since I was a first time mom. There are a few things in there though that I just don't agree with. The biggest for me is the "cry it out" method. First, I want to say that if you use that method, that is totally fine. I will not judge as I have a few friends that do this method. I have also had to use this method from time to time but I, personally, do not make it a habit.
This book did help me in a lot of other areas though. It helped to give me signs or reasons on why Anna would wake not long after putting her down during naps. It also helped in other areas in growth and development, like in the feed/wake/sleep cycle. This really helped me understand why it was so important for them to get full feedings in. So I do recommend the book, even though there are some aspects of it that I don't totally agree with.
Going back to the rocking. I have rocked Anna to bed for as long as I can remember. I enjoy the cuddling and just having that feeling of her falling asleep in my arms. As she got older, I would rock her for a bit and then place her in her bed, sleepy but still awake. About a year or so ago, we stopped rocking. Though it was nice for awhile, I did miss it. Then out of the blue earlier this year, she asked to be rocked again. My guess is between her getting a new sister soon and a new house, she was needing some security again. Could I argue or blame her? Of course not! The poor girl has endured a lot of change in just a years time. So I started rocking here again. Though it made it for a challenge when she did randomly fall asleep on me as I was around 7 or 8 months pregnant, and she was still in a full crib. Hoisting her up over that rail with a big belly was always fun.
Last night I was rocking her again. Having her snuggle up with me, wanting to sing songs like "Jesus Loves Me", "You Are My Sunshine", "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star", or even the "ABC Song", melts my heart to no end. Cuddling with her also made me sad for those babies that don't get that. While rocking her, in her silence, reminded me of an article I read around the time Anna became a part of this family about an orphanage with no crying babies. The story is extremely sad and I get tears in my eyes thinking about it. I want to scoop all those babies up in my arms and let them know that they are loved. They stopped crying because no one responds to them. You can read more about the orphanage here. I want my girls to know that when they cry, I will answer them. I think that is one of my biggest reasons why I do not like the cry it out method from Baby Wise. Now, like I mentioned before, I had to use it a few times. But on a whole, I do not and will not use this. Some people say, "You are just spoiling them" or "You're just going to create more problems for you later on." Maybe the second more than the first, but over all, I don't think you can spoil a child to much. You can't love on a child to much. It took us so long to get Anna that loving on her was all I could do. Being in awe of God was all I could do. Rocking her to sleep was something that I just had to do because I never wanted to let her go. I wanted to soak up that moment of her snuggling close as I realized a few things: 1 being that she was ours and 2 this wasn't going to last. She may enjoy it now, she may want to still be rocked when she is 5, but truthfully, it's not going to last. She is going to wake up one day and not want to be rocked or have snuggle time before bed.
Remembering that article makes me remember that not every child has this privilege of being loved on, rocked, or sang to. I want my girls to know and remember how much they are loved by remembering the snuggles, rocking, and little songs we would sing before going to bed. I also want them to know that mommy and daddy are there for them, even during the night. I want them to know how much we love them. I don't think I'm spoiling them to much, I just like to look at it as being very lovable.
The other night Anna had a really rough night. She woke up around 10pm or so and just could not get back to sleep. We had her go potty, turn her music on, and crawl back in bed but she just whined and cried about wanting to rock. "Mommy rock you" is what she says (so cute). So I told her to grab her buddies, her snuggles (that's her blanket), and come on over. We rocked and rocked and rocked that evening. She still didn't go to sleep. I was so tired so I decided to hop in bed with her. If she wasn't going to sleep, I wasn't going to sleep, so why not snuggle with her in her own bed. Eventually I would wake up and could sneak out of her room. Sure enough, that worked! Was I comfortable? Nope! I was so sore the next morning. Was it worth it? To her? You betcha it was. To me? Yes. Despite me being not very comfortable, I enjoyed laying next to her all snuggled up. would I do it again? If it means that she knows I am near when she needs me - yes!
Wouldn't God do the same for us? Wouldn't He crawl in spaces that might be uncomfortable to show that he loves us beyond measure. That He wouldn't care about His own comfort just to show us how much He loves and cares for us. He also does things that we might not like (like making us cry things out) to also prove His love for us. I'm not saying that God makes himself uncomfortable for us, but that He would do the same if He needed. We love our children beyond words. God loves us even more than that! He loves us so much that He gave His only son to die for us. How much more uncomfortable can you get with giving up your only child just for us? Reminds me of Abraham when God tested him to sacrifice his son Issac. Abraham obeyed and made his way to the site where he was to sacrifice him. He trusted God enough to know that things would work out in the end. If I was put to the test like Abraham to sacrifice one my girls I honestly don't think I would obey. I can't imagine giving up one my daughters for someone else's life. Yet, God did that just for us.
So the question still remains - can you spoil your child to much? The answer is no. You can't spoil your child to much with love because you can't love on them enough. If you think you are loving on them a ton already, love on them more. You won't hurt them by doing so. If anything, you will increase their security in knowing how much you care for them. God's love for me (us) is unfathomable to me. I want my girls to have that same feeling of how much I love them. Go ahead, spoil them with all the love and affection you can possibly give.
This book did help me in a lot of other areas though. It helped to give me signs or reasons on why Anna would wake not long after putting her down during naps. It also helped in other areas in growth and development, like in the feed/wake/sleep cycle. This really helped me understand why it was so important for them to get full feedings in. So I do recommend the book, even though there are some aspects of it that I don't totally agree with.
Going back to the rocking. I have rocked Anna to bed for as long as I can remember. I enjoy the cuddling and just having that feeling of her falling asleep in my arms. As she got older, I would rock her for a bit and then place her in her bed, sleepy but still awake. About a year or so ago, we stopped rocking. Though it was nice for awhile, I did miss it. Then out of the blue earlier this year, she asked to be rocked again. My guess is between her getting a new sister soon and a new house, she was needing some security again. Could I argue or blame her? Of course not! The poor girl has endured a lot of change in just a years time. So I started rocking here again. Though it made it for a challenge when she did randomly fall asleep on me as I was around 7 or 8 months pregnant, and she was still in a full crib. Hoisting her up over that rail with a big belly was always fun.
Last night I was rocking her again. Having her snuggle up with me, wanting to sing songs like "Jesus Loves Me", "You Are My Sunshine", "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star", or even the "ABC Song", melts my heart to no end. Cuddling with her also made me sad for those babies that don't get that. While rocking her, in her silence, reminded me of an article I read around the time Anna became a part of this family about an orphanage with no crying babies. The story is extremely sad and I get tears in my eyes thinking about it. I want to scoop all those babies up in my arms and let them know that they are loved. They stopped crying because no one responds to them. You can read more about the orphanage here. I want my girls to know that when they cry, I will answer them. I think that is one of my biggest reasons why I do not like the cry it out method from Baby Wise. Now, like I mentioned before, I had to use it a few times. But on a whole, I do not and will not use this. Some people say, "You are just spoiling them" or "You're just going to create more problems for you later on." Maybe the second more than the first, but over all, I don't think you can spoil a child to much. You can't love on a child to much. It took us so long to get Anna that loving on her was all I could do. Being in awe of God was all I could do. Rocking her to sleep was something that I just had to do because I never wanted to let her go. I wanted to soak up that moment of her snuggling close as I realized a few things: 1 being that she was ours and 2 this wasn't going to last. She may enjoy it now, she may want to still be rocked when she is 5, but truthfully, it's not going to last. She is going to wake up one day and not want to be rocked or have snuggle time before bed.
Remembering that article makes me remember that not every child has this privilege of being loved on, rocked, or sang to. I want my girls to know and remember how much they are loved by remembering the snuggles, rocking, and little songs we would sing before going to bed. I also want them to know that mommy and daddy are there for them, even during the night. I want them to know how much we love them. I don't think I'm spoiling them to much, I just like to look at it as being very lovable.
The other night Anna had a really rough night. She woke up around 10pm or so and just could not get back to sleep. We had her go potty, turn her music on, and crawl back in bed but she just whined and cried about wanting to rock. "Mommy rock you" is what she says (so cute). So I told her to grab her buddies, her snuggles (that's her blanket), and come on over. We rocked and rocked and rocked that evening. She still didn't go to sleep. I was so tired so I decided to hop in bed with her. If she wasn't going to sleep, I wasn't going to sleep, so why not snuggle with her in her own bed. Eventually I would wake up and could sneak out of her room. Sure enough, that worked! Was I comfortable? Nope! I was so sore the next morning. Was it worth it? To her? You betcha it was. To me? Yes. Despite me being not very comfortable, I enjoyed laying next to her all snuggled up. would I do it again? If it means that she knows I am near when she needs me - yes!
Wouldn't God do the same for us? Wouldn't He crawl in spaces that might be uncomfortable to show that he loves us beyond measure. That He wouldn't care about His own comfort just to show us how much He loves and cares for us. He also does things that we might not like (like making us cry things out) to also prove His love for us. I'm not saying that God makes himself uncomfortable for us, but that He would do the same if He needed. We love our children beyond words. God loves us even more than that! He loves us so much that He gave His only son to die for us. How much more uncomfortable can you get with giving up your only child just for us? Reminds me of Abraham when God tested him to sacrifice his son Issac. Abraham obeyed and made his way to the site where he was to sacrifice him. He trusted God enough to know that things would work out in the end. If I was put to the test like Abraham to sacrifice one my girls I honestly don't think I would obey. I can't imagine giving up one my daughters for someone else's life. Yet, God did that just for us.
So the question still remains - can you spoil your child to much? The answer is no. You can't spoil your child to much with love because you can't love on them enough. If you think you are loving on them a ton already, love on them more. You won't hurt them by doing so. If anything, you will increase their security in knowing how much you care for them. God's love for me (us) is unfathomable to me. I want my girls to have that same feeling of how much I love them. Go ahead, spoil them with all the love and affection you can possibly give.
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